No Idea
by Faith Lee
Summary: A series of angsty drabbles. Up to five, going until I feel like stopping. NEW Alphonse drabble. Angst.
1. Can't You See?

**No Idea**

All this time, and you have no idea.

It's a wonder you haven't figured it out yet; how I feel about you. All these years, I've been beside you, behind you, below you, always loving you. You haven't noticed.

I've been starting to wonder if you ever will.

In all honesty, it's not that hard to figure out how I feel about you. In fact, in one look, a Miss Winry Rockbell figured it out.

"You're in love with him."

"Who?"

"The colonel."

"My superior? Colonel Mustang?"

"That's the one, the one that always picks on Edward for being short. You're completely enamored with him."

"Miss Rockbell, I think you have no idea what you're talking about."

"Tut-tut, don't be nasty if I tell you what you already know. And plus, any woman who can put up with the colonel like you can _has_ to be in love with him."

"I'm sorry, Miss Rockbell. It seems that this paperwork has snuck up on me. I must be left alone now."

"…Then why do those papers say, 'For Roy Mustang' on them?"

So you see, it's not quite that had to figure out.

What I don't understand…is why it is taking you so long for you to see?

Can't you see?

Can't you see it in my eyes, when I look at you? How much I love you?

Can't you see it in the way I smile when you say something to me? The way I jump every time you need something done?

Can't you see it in the way I want to protect you? Not just from a lower-ranking officer to her superior…I couldn't bear it if you were to suddenly disappear.

All these feelings, all these signs, and you still can't see.

You, the infamous Roy Mustang, the womanizer.

And you can't see the woman right in front of you. Waiting, wanting. You can't see the woman who has only _ever_ loved you.

You can't see.

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**Disclaimer: **I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.

**Note:** Random. Sorry if Riza seems out of character, I never actually pay attention to her and I've never actually liked this pairing. But, this just came into my mind as unrequited love. I find that so heartbreaking. If I get positive reviews, maybe I'll just make this a little 10 chapter drabble fiction. Possibly different pairings... hmm. Well, just a thought. Coming out of my writers block here. Feedback is appreciated!


	2. Don't Count

**No Idea**

* * *

I see you. I watch you every day. I watch as you struggle with the paperwork, struggle with your soul and your sins. All this time, I want to help you, but you push everyone away, thinking to not condemn us as well. You lock yourself up in your office until all hours of the night, mulling through your sins in your mind, playing with your gun, debating whether or not to use it, to end the sorrows. But you never have. 

I can't begin to imagine what goes on inside your head, what you hear in your worst nightmares…what faces come to haunt you at night. But if you would only talk to someone, maybe you can move on from guilt to forgiveness…

But you don't want that.

You act like no one likes you. Which is partially true, now that Maes is dead…I wouldn't call Havoc a friend… and the rest of us follow you because you're our superior… You think no one would miss you if you were suddenly gone. Hell, not many would, Taisa.

…Then I guess I don't count.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.

**A Note: **Well, this is number two...I have no idea where this came from... still in Riza's point of view, with depressed!Roy and dead!Maes... sniff I need to get more ideas. Well, whatever. I'm starting to like Riza more and more.


	3. Blind

**No Idea**

* * *

I've been told that I walk through life oblivious to everything that's going on around me. In fact, I've been told this many times. Then of course, I've also been told that I'm a bastard, that I'm cold-hearted, that I drink to much, I have a death wish, I'm a pervert, and that I'm a womanizer. So I guess you can say that I don't really listen when people start talking to me. I have selective hearing. Honestly. I also manipulate words in a sentence to make it sound like I want it to…like "No way, get away from me pervert," is automatically formated to say, "Take me, I'm yours." 

…

Okay, so maybe that makes no sense, but the point is, when people talk to me, I see nothing. I walk through life with my eyes closed and earplugs in.

Why?

Because I've learned. I've learned that when you walk through life with all senses alert, you see things…that you can't change. You do things…you say things…because you pay attention, because I was ambitious, because…

I've killed people.

I was fully aware. I knew exactly what I was doing.

Innocent people.

I knew. I knew when I snapped my fingers that the fire would consume them and they would die.

They had families.

But I still did it. All my senses were booming, my eyes were perfect, I could hear perfectly, I almost smell the fear in the room…

They had _children. _

People wonder why I pay no attention to anyone, or anything.

It's because I've learned.

* * *

_Faith: Well, that was in the PoV of Mustang...not exactly romance. I've always kind of wondered how it was that Mustang got to be so damn blind when it comes to Riza...or anything...Hence the non-romantic stuff. More coming up. Yay._

_Disclaimer: Faith doesn't own Fullmetal Alchemist._


	4. Hypocrite

**No Idea

* * *

**

Riza, Riza, Riza.

Just your name engulfs me in flames. I love the way your hair glints in the sunlight, how your arms tense when you're about to shoot your gun. I even love the way you look when your looking at that bastard Taisa…

Like you love him.

I always see you cursing about how he never notices you, Riza, but you can't say any different.

After all, I've been in love with you for…

And you still haven't noticed.

* * *

_Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. _

_A Note: This was in the point of view of Havoc...in love with Riza...strange pairing. I kind of like it. I originally had a couple more lines at the end, but I liked the ending so I left it as is. _


	5. Doubt

**No Idea

* * *

**

I can still remember when I could feel…anything. Everything. I could feel the grass in between my toes, the dampness of the leaves on my face and in my hair as I ran through the trees…And now, I don't. I don't…feel. Anything. Ever. My senses have been taken away, ripped from my soul with my body…gone forever. Will I ever feel anything again?

I've been a suit of armor for so long…I've been doubting if I ever will have a body again.

Nii-san always tells me…we will get better. He will make things _right_ again.

So we go around, looking for a stone that doesn't exist and fighting people. Killing people. And the weight on Nii-san's shoulders grows heavier and heavier with guilt…_I killed him…I killed them…How could I…Mother? _

It'll be all right, Al. I promise.

…You wish, Nii-san. I can see that you're only saying this to make me feel better. You're giving up, I know. I can tell. I can _feel _it. You know we'll never get better.

You know I'll never feel again.

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.

Faith: This is in the point of view of Alphonse...somehow, this changed from an AlxWinry to depressed!Alphonse and doubting!Alphonse. Angst. Wow. Where did THAT come from? Oh, and every time, I mean to do this, but I get so excited that I'm updating, I forget... So, Reviewer Responses (because I'm awesome).

**unexpection: **Yes, Roy's complete lack of brain is quite amusing, seeing how he's always portrayed as a womanizer...yet he can't see poor Riza... sniff ARGH! DAMN YOU ROY! But...hey, he's a bastard and that's why we love him. Correct?

**rizahawkeye21: **Oh, Riza's situation with Mustang is like everyone's situation...love from afar but they're too blind to see it...always...or if they're not, then they're jerks and are ignoring you. glares

**Frip-Ouille:** blanches Um, I think your English is better than mine! Thank you for your compliments (I like my stories too, hee hee) and for your review!

**Blonde Hurricane: **Yeah, I always wondered why Mustang was so braindead when it came to Riza...so I kind of inferenced a reason...if that's a word...erm...yeah. Thank you very much!

**paperback novel: **Thank you! I will! Yes, ma'am!

**Regaime Seishi: **Well, here's an Alphonse one for you, because I love him and he needs some lovin', though he's not being loved in this one..next one! I swear! Cross my heart and hope to die...Made you cry, eh? You know, I always thought that if you didn't cry while writing, that the readers wouldn't cry, but you cried and you don't even LIKE Mustang! For shame, Faith, FOR SHAME! runs off to cry (how could I? how could I not cry? AAH!) Oh, and it's reiterate. Thanks. .

Bye now!


	6. Years

**No Idea

* * *

**

It's been years.

Years since Father left. Years since we first started Alchemy. Years since Winry's parents were killed. Years since Mother got sick. …Years since Mother… Years since we tried to perform human transmutation. Years since Alphonse lost his body. Years since I first joined the military.

It's been years.

And what?

What has happened?

Death. Murders. Mysteries. Guilt. Battles. Death. Blood.

The pungent smell of the rich life-giving liquid stains my hands and my nightmares. And no matter how many times I wash my hands…both the automail and the flesh…I can't get it off. It won't come off. I scrub and scrub and scrub and yet still, when I wipe off the droplets of soap with the towel…

There's red. Everywhere.

That's why I wear gloves. Not to hide the automail. No. That's not it at all.

There's just too much blood.

* * *

Disclaimer: Me no own FMA.

Faith: Did this orignally start out as RizaXRoy? Now it's angst. I am crying right now. Really crying. God, Edward...and this is just my Edward...my interpretation of why he wears gloves...he can't really feel this way, Faith, this is just your version of Angst!Edward so relax...

**Nekomo: **Sorry...there has to be breaks between the Roy and Riza-ness. Check back later. Thanks for reading!


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